I'm "that" mom.

I've come to the conclusion in the last 10 (11?) months that i'm "that" mom. You know, the one that people always look at and say shit about behind their hands because they can't believe i'm parenting a certain way. Examples include the following:

1) Sometimes my baby goes places without socks. No...Sophie's feet are not cold...and no she did not "lose" her socks and shoes. She is hot-natured like her daddy and sweats like a dickens. If I put socks on her...she eats them. You think i'm kidding? She's got 9 teeth...i've got baby socks with holes in them. She also goes places without a jacket sometimes. Today it was 75 when I left the house...when I went to pick her up after work, it'd gotten cooler. I forgot her jacket. Oh well, wrapping a blanket around her for the 2 minute trek upstairs isn't going to hurt.

2) I take my daughter out with us to eat. Sometimes it's later then 8 pm. *gasp* Before you roll your eyes, no...I don't take her to fancy schmancy restaurants after a certain time...i'm not an idiot. Yes, she's an infant...she makes babbling noises and giggles and coos...but I'm smart enough to know that if she starts freaking out or screaming, I take her outside. Therefore, you really don't have to sit there and make grimaces and complain about my loud baby when it's 2 in the afternoon and we're in a public place. Tonight, we took her out because mommy had a shitty day...and daddy knew that if I had to cook it was all over and I was done for. So he offered to take me out real quick so I wouldn't have to pull out the pots and pans after a long day of work. We put her in pjs...she ate like a champ and danced to Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer when it came on. There was 1 other couple in the restaurant and they made all sorts of crappy remarks to each other concerning why my child was out so late. 


3) I feed Sophie processed food. I know...horrible, right? I understand that some of the crap out there has way too much sodium and way too many preservatives and all that jazz. 9 times out 10 I try to give her what we're having so she gets a home-cooked meal. I have been known to give her hot dogs, beans and wienies, ravioli, and canned green beans. Does this make me a bad mother? God I hope not. I'm not super woman...and after working all day I can't always get a home cooked meal on the table while taking care of her and waiting for my better half to get home from HIS long day of work. 


4) When Sophie goes for the remote, I take out a battery and give it back to her and let her have a field day. I've learned that if I take it away...she has a meltdown. If I say no and move it out of her reach...she goes for it with a renewed vigor like it's a solid piece of gold. If I let her have it? She plays with it for 5 minutes...10 tops, and then she's done with it. Which option would you choose?


5) I formula feed. Sophie has drank formula since she was born and she's no worse for wear. I knew before having her that it would be impossible to breastfeed. I take several heart medications and some are dangerous to infants when transferred in breast milk. I went off of the meds for 9 months and had to go right back on them after she was born. I couldn't even pump. I get trashed for "not trying". I get trashed for "not understanding" when I try to offer support for those that have a hard time breastfeeding in public. It sucks that I never got a chance to but i'm not hurting my daughter by giving her formula. As a fellow mama friend once said in her blog...Formula is not poison. I refuse to feel bad for providing for my daughter and making the best choice that is best for both of us. 


6) I let Sophie have free reign of the entire apartment. How else is she going to explore? She knows what the bathroom is and where the tub is. When i'm not right there with her, that door stays closed. When we are in the back room where the litter box is situated in our half bath...that door stays closed. A gate blocks the kitchen where the cat food/water is. Otherwise, she's good to go. This way, if i'm getting ready for work and she gets bored in our bedroom...she can crawl down the hall and head to her room...where there are toys and books and such. She can even head to the front living room...where more toys and books are located. Everything is baby proofed and what we don't want her to have is high out of reach. 


7) I encourage baby babbling. When we are in Target...i talk to her. I giggle with her, sing softly to her, get her to babble back at me. I don't scream at her if she's fussing too loudly...i redirect her into laughing at a silly song or something like that. This is an issue because if she's babbling too 'loudly' and i'm not correcting it, I'm judged for not disciplining or for 'letting her do anything she wants' She's 10 months old...live a little and move along if you don't want to hear her. When she's older and throwing a fit because I took away a toy or a snack or a book or SOMEthing...then yes, I will correct her behavior...but for now i'm letting her learn on her own. 


I'm sure there's more. I'm sure i've been judged a thousand times over for every little thing I do when it comes to being a parent. I should dress her in more pink, I should keep socks and shoes on her, I should feed her only organic foods, I should breastfeed or risk her being stupid, etc. etc. yadda yadda yadda. My response? judge away. Every mom is different and every situation is different and unless you are truly super mom and a half...you haven't experienced everything yet...so why judge?